I always say it that Nigerians are their Brother's keeper.
Its just that things have been bad that people dont feel safe anymore to "keep" for their brothers and sisters. LOL
When i was growing up, my whole village raised me. I remember how our neighbors scold me when they see me doing something wrong. Some of them sometimes even leave their foods on fire to come and report me to my grandmother! And they will wait while my grandmother took 'action' on me for whatever offence had just being reported to her. (When they finally remember they put food on fire, it gave me a different kind of joy to see them gather their wrappers and race all the way to their houses. LOL)
That community living is gradually leaving us as a people. We see things go wrong and we are scared to approach our neighbours. We dont know how they will take it. And rightly so, because many people have been given the embarrassment of their lives just because they went to give advise or suggestion.
SCENARIO A
My cousin pinged me on bbm a few days back to tell me she thinks she just crossed that tiny street between concerned citizen and Aproko. She was walking down the street when she saw a little girl less than 3 years old crying profusely while being carried by her older sibling. A woman who seemed to be their mum was walking behind them. The cry was increasing in vibration and momentum that my cousin looked closer to see if she could decode why. She noticed that the little girl had relaxer on her hair. And the way she as touching her head and shaking her head made her believe the relaxar might be hurting her. My cousin couldnt take it anymore so she walked up to them and said " madam, this relaxer is paining this girl na. Dont you think she is too young for this?" The look the woman threw her could melt butter! The woman just retorted "Is it your business. Mtchewww"?
Well, nobody needed to tell my cousin to face her front and go her way.
When she told me, i actually asked her what was her business inside, But when i thought of it very well, i saw she actually did the right thing. And i would probably have don same if i were in her shoes!
SCENARIO B
A family in the street i lived on as a single girl had a teenage daughter. Whenever the parents werent home,this girl came downstairs and hung around with boys on the street. She always made sure to go back upstairs before her parents came home. Everyone on the street knew how 'friendly' she was with the boys except her parents. On so many occasions, i overhead people discussing her and how she will soon "get spoilt, if she already wasnt". Now, the thing is that her parents were very troublesome people. Nobody related with them because they were always ready for a fight or quarrel. So many times, i asked "Why doesnt someone tell this girl's parents about her behavior?" And i was always told that if i wanted the biggest embarrassment of my life, i should go and knock on their door. So noone did. Till the girl got sick. It was hush hush but the rumor was she was pregnant. We stopped seeing her a while before i moved from there and the story was that she was sent to the east to live with her aunty. To keep her away from the shame.
How things would have ended differently if her parents were approachable people who took advise!
We, as a people, dont like being corrected. A lot of us see correction as criticism. I know that there are actually very critical people that go up and down looking for people to criticize but then, that isnt everybody.
Mothers flare up when people try to correct their kids. I think it makes us feel like those people are judging us and indirectly saying we are inadequate. Let's calm down a bit more na, haba! Some of these people actually have good intentions but we shut them up before we even hear it!
The truth is that NOONE KNOWS IT ALL. You cannot be right all the time. Someone else might know more than you. You can only see your front, you cant see your back. These are life's truths.
Our society is falling apart because a lot of wrongs are going unchecked. people that could have helped keep their mouths shut so they dont get labelled "Poke-nosers"
Lets be more open to correction. Listen to what the person has to say. Take minute to think it through and see if there is sense in it. Discard if not. Use if it makes sense.
I think we need wisdom. And only God can give wisdom so i think we should ask God for wisdom.
Wisdom to know what to accept and apply and what to discard. Wisdom to do the right thing
The elders that said "It takes a village to raise a child" knew what they were saying. Don't you think?
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